Man gets virtual paper cut while reading an e-book.

Los Angeles (Concocted News)--Ed Fletcher, 37, of Los Angeles filed a lawsuit today claiming he suffered a virtual paper cut while reading an e-book.  Fletcher claims the virtual paper cut eventually became virtually infected and caused him to spend three days on Web MD confirming his diagnosis. He further claims the virtual paper cut prevented him from texting for more than two hours which caused his friends to panic and assume the worst.  "I need to be in constant touch with people," said Fletcher, "They and I both know that if I don't text every 15 minutes or so then I'm probably dead."

Fletcher is seeking $300,000 in damages from the tablet manufacturer and the publisher of the e-book.  He said he is willing to accept payment in the form of game tokens or iTunes credit.